Tough Year

I think I have mentioned before that 2010 has been a roller-coaster for me dealing with different challenges. In particular was the loss of my Aunt Linda last month to cancer. To this day, I still saved the last E-mail conversation we had. Though a short one, I still find it a meaningful one as I let her know I was walking the Sole Burner for her. With that said, & I digress, I am planning to walk it again next year which is May 9, 2011 in her honor.  To this day, I regret not speaking/visiting her more often than just family get-togethers or events (but not beating myself up over it). I say this as I almost feel that I had more to say to her or any advice she could have given me along the way-to hold onto. I also say this as I feel how much more grateful for the family I do have and how lucky I am to have them.
In addition, I had also recently lost another Aunt of mine, my mom's sister Judy who lost her battle with ALS  I was so glad that I was able to communicate with her at my cousin's wedding back in May. I say "communicate" as she could not talk, but could write down what she wanted to say. Again I felt I had so much to tell her/talk about, but I also felt a loss of words. I did mention to her that we would have brought Ziva to the wedding reception, but would have been hard with her nap schedule so forth (& not sure how crabby she would/wouldn't have been). But she reminded me that Josh & I should be able to do things together that we love as well (aka date nights). So I felt that that alone was very meaningful. We had also talked about how my mom (& Auntie Lou) had been visiting her every week the past few months helping her out & keeping her company. Aunt Judy really enjoyed that & wished that there would be someone to help my mom out in her time of need. In a way, I took this as a hint and a promise to make sure my mom is taken care of as well as she took care of Aunt Judy in her time of need.
And as I left to say goodbye, she grasped me by the arm as if to embrace me in a hug. I will never forget